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Becoming a Muslim
By Afrah Alshaibani
May 2, 1996.
Ever since I can remember, my family attended a non-denominational conservative
Christian church (Church of Christ). I grew up in the church, taught bible
school and sang in the choir. As a young teenager I began asking questions (as I
think everyone does at one point in their lives): Why was I a member of the
Church of Christ and not say Lutheran, Catholic or Methodist? If various
churches are teaching conflicting doctrine, how do we know which one is right?
Are they all right? Do `all paths lead to God' as I had heard some say? Others
say that as long as you are a good person it doesn't matter what you believe -
is that true?
After some soul searching I decided that I
did believe that there was an ultimate truth and in an attempt to find that
truth I began a comparison study of various churches. I decided that I believed
in the Bible and would join the church that best followed the Bible. After a
lengthy study, I decided to stay with the Church of Christ, satisfied that its
doctrines were biblically sound (unaware at this stage that there could be
various interpretations of the Bible).
I spent a year at Michigan Christian
College, a small college affiliated with the Churches of Christ, but was not
challenged academically and so transferred to Western Michigan University.
Having applied late for student housing, I was placed in the international dorm.
Although my roommate was American, I felt surrounded by strange people from
strange places. It was in fact my first real experience with cultural diversity
and it scared me (having been raised in a white, middle class, Christian
community). I wanted to change dorms but there wasn't anything available. I did
really like my roommate and decided to stick out the semester.
My roommate became very involved in the
dorm activities and got to know most everyone in the dorm. I however performed
with the marching band and spent most of my time with band people. Marching
season soon ended and finding myself with time on my hands, I joined my roommate
on her adventures around the dorm. It turned out to be a wonderful, fascinating
experience! There were a large number of Arab men living in the dorm. They were
charming, handsome, and a lot of fun to be around. My roommate started dating
one of them and we ended up spending most of our time with the Arabs. I guess I
knew they were Muslims (although very few of them were practicing). We
never really discussed religion, we were just having fun.
The year passed and I had started seeing
one of the Arabs. Again, we were just enjoying each other's company and never
discussed our religious differences. Neither of us were practicing at this time
so it never really became an issue for us. I did, deep down, feel guilty for not
attending church, but I pushed it in the back of my mind. I was having too much
fun.
Another year passed and I was home for
summer vacation when my roommate called me with some very distressing news:
she'd become a Muslim!! I was horrified. She didn't tell me why she converted,
just that she had spent a lot of time talking with her boyfriend's brother and
it all made sense to her. After we hung up, I immediately wrote her a long
letter explaining that she was ruining her life and to just give Christianity
one more chance. That same summer my boyfriend transferred to Azusa Pacific
University in California. We decided to get married and move to California
together. Again, since neither one were practicing, religion was not discussed.
Secretly I started reading books on Islam.
However I read books that were written by non-Muslims. One of the books I read
was Islam Revealed by Anis Sorosh. I felt guilty about my friend's
conversion. I felt that if I had been a better Christian, she would have turned
to the church rather than Islam. Islam was a man-made religion, I believed, and
filled with contradictions. After reading Sorosh's book, I thought I could
convert my friend and my husband to Christianity.
At APU, my husband was required to take a
few religion courses. One day he came home from class and said: "The more I
learn about Christianity, the stronger my belief in Islam becomes." At about
this same time he started showing signs of wanting to practice his religion
again. Our problems began. We started talking about religion and arguing about
our different beliefs. He told me I should learn about Islam and I told him I
already knew everything I needed to know. I got out Sorosh's book and told him I
could never believe in Islam. My husband is not a scholar by any stretch of the
imagination, yet he had an answer for everything I showed him in Sorosh's book.
I was impressed by his knowledge. He told me that if I really wanted
to learn about Islam it must be through Islamic sources.
He bought a few books for me from an Islamic bookstore and I started taking
classes at a local mosque. What a difference the Islam I learned about from
Muslim sources from the Islam I learned about from non-Muslims!
It was so difficult though when I actually
decided to convert. My pride stood in the way for awhile. How could I admit to
my husband and my friend that they were right all along? I felt humiliated,
embarrassed. Soon though, I could deny the truth no longer, swallowed my pride,
and alhamdulilah, embraced Islam - the best decision I ever made.
A few things I want to say to the
non-Muslim reader:
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When I originally began my search for the
truth all those years ago, I made a few wrong assumptions. First, I assumed
that the truth is with Christianity only. It never occurred to me at that time
to look outside Christianity. Second, I assumed that the Bible was the true
Word of God. These were bad assumptions because they prohibited me from
looking at things objectively. When I began my earnest study of Islam, I had
to start at the very beginning, with no preconceived ideas. I was not a
Christian looking at Islam; I looked at both Islam and Christianity (and many
other religions) from the point of view of an outsider. My advice to you is to
be a critical thinker and a critical reader.
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Another mistake that many people make
when talking about Islam is that they pick out a certain teaching and judge
the whole of Islam on that one point. For example, many people say that Islam
is prejudiced towards women because Islamic laws of inheritance award the male
twice as much as the female. What they fail to learn, however, is that males
have financial responsibilities in Islam that females do not have. It is like
putting a puzzle together: until you have all the pieces in the right places,
you cannot make a statement about the picture, you cannot look at one little
piece of the puzzle and judge the whole picture.
-
Many people said that the only reason I
converted was because of my husband. It is true that I studied Islam because
he asked me to - but I accepted Islam because it is the truth. My husband and
I are currently separated and plan to divorce in June, insha' Allah. My faith
in Islam has never been stronger than it is now. I look forward to finding a
practicing Muslim husband, insha' Allah, and growing in my faith and practice.
Being a good Muslim is my number one priority.
May Allah lead all of us closer to the
truth.
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